There was a time when man used only what he needed.
That was after the invention of running water.
But most certainly before the invention of diet water.
So what happened along the way?
It probably started innocent enough.
Somebody peeled a banana.
And saved it for later.
Maybe gave it to a friend.
And the friend thought,
‘hey, it’s nice to get a banana that’s already been peeled’
And before we knew it,
Some company started marketing pre-peeled bananas.
It’s a gradual creep from what man needs,
To all the useless crap man ends up buying.
But we are the Kings of Bold.
And we have had enough.
Our Kingdom lives by the basics.
We think a banana’s peal is pretty good on its own.
We don’t see the need to pay extra for pre-stressed denim.
We can stress it ourselves for free.
There should never be room on the shelf for designer pet perfume.
And we most certainly don’t pay 2 times more for a flashy razor blade that actually doesn’t cut any better,
just so corporate shareholders can sip champagne with Roger Federer.
Beer? Yes. Tequila. Why not
Not in our castle!
Raise the drawbridge and light the cauldrons.
The enemy is at the gate.
And they smell like hang-dry-scented fabric softener.
And they can’t make us pay.
No longer will we be held hostage by overpriced, overmarketed crap.
We are the kings of our castle.
In this kingdom we are people not numbers.
And we know one another by name.
We are kings of the genuine, the personal, the bare necessities.
We are the Kings of Bold.